Descriptive+words,+sentences,+and+stories+-+Meg+Rice

I plan to demonstrate two tools that improved the quality of writing of my first graders. One involved the use of a projected scoring rubric for critical thinking; the other, was the use of wireless technology in the editing and revising process.

However, teaching a class of six year olds to use a scoring rubric was not unlike herding frogs. Students’ attention hopped around the classroom and rarely remained on the rubric or writing sample long enough to gather an understanding applicable to their future writing. **Many** To increase the number of students making that connection, **we practiced scoring writing** projector, wireless hub and an InterWrite School Pad. The following year I added a scanner. Wireless technology facilitated our practice using a projected rubric for scoring student generated writing samples and increased the ease and frequency of such practice.
 * Rationale #1:**
 * A clear understanding of the target is necessary for successful performance of any task,**
 * academic or non-academic.** For this reason, I use task specific rubrics with writing projects.
 * students never made a connection between the rubric and altering their writing habits.**
 * samples on an overhead projector. The need to flip and flop between OHP pages and the**
 * expense proved less than ideal.** Through a grant proposal I obtained a ceiling mounted

As in any subject or grade level, **first graders need multiple exposures to new concepts or** conference and peer group editing and revision sessions, to polish students’ skills. Whole class rubric scoring sessions, using an InterWrite School pad, are instructional by nature. A student author holds a wireless pen and makes corrections as they are suggested by classmates. Simultaneous use of a scoring rubric and writing sample clarifies the target.
 * Rationale #2:**
 * skills before they are able to apply them successfully in original solutions, work, or**
 * writing.** To increase exposures to practice, I employ a combination of whole class, individual

incorporated class editing/revising and scoring via a projected rubric. It was supported by the use of an InterWrite School Pad, an LCD projector and network filed Word documents or
 * Subject:** Writing a descriptive sentence using my version of the writing process

scanned rough drafts. The following week students progress to writing a descriptive story about their use of the same object.


 * Grade level:** First grade
 * Duration:** The entire writing project spans a week, including several 15 minute sessions to use the scoring rubric, edit and revise all of the students’ rough drafts.


 * Objectives:**


 * Students use descriptive language to tell and write observable attributes
 * Brainstorm to generate a chart paper word bank
 * Students copy words they want into a “Words I Use When I Write” book.
 * Teacher models a descriptive sentence
 * Students recognizing correct and incorrect sample sentences.
 * Students write a descriptive sentence in rough draft.
 * Teacher explains the rubric
 * Students score teacher generated sample sentences with the rubric.
 * Students alter their rough draft if needed.
 * Students edit projected student writing sample; final screens are saved and printed.
 * Students publish their sentences and illustrate.
 * Students read sentences as class attempts to match the correct object.


 * Materials:**


 * Books about swimming, the ocean, and visiting the beach
 * Objects to be observed and written about. (Swim gear, silkworm, apples…)
 * Student writing spirals, large chart paper, markers, pencils and erasers
 * “Words I Use When I Write” books
 * (Ceiling mounted) LCD projector, computer and a wireless hub to talk to an InterWrite School Pad or similar wireless tablet. Having access to and use of a scanner is nice, but not necessary.
 * Students’ anonymous sample sentences, available as word documents or scanned copies in my network folder.
 * Our scoring rubric projected onto the whiteboard and hard copies in students’ hands for their use in the scoring, editing and revising discussion.
 * Publishing paper with lines and blank space for an illustration


 * Procedures:**
 * Day One:**

For several days prior, books about swimming and the beach have been read. A note to parents requested students bring swim gear to school for this project. The teacher also has a collection of items from home and Goodwill already at school.

· Students use descriptive language to tell shoulder partners observable attributes of their object: swim gear, silkworm, apple, pumpkin… o “Please look closely at your object. Think of three or more words that tell about how it looks and feels and what it’s made of. These words are called describing words. Hold up three fingers when you’ve thought three or more describing words.” o “Now write these words onto the next blank page in your writing spirals.” § //Informal assessment in phonics, spelling and penmanship// o “Show your object to your shoulder partner and tell them your words, then listen to their words. Talk and help each other think of more words to write.”

· A word bank on chart paper is generated during a brainstorming session. o Students hold the pen and write, or the teacher writes and kids spell, or words are keyed into projected word document, printed if needed. § //Use calling cards to gather describing words for charted word bank//

· Students copy words they want to use to describe their object into their copy of a “Words I Use When I Write” book. This becomes instructional time; finding the page in alphabetical order to write upon, also penmanship may be modeled and checked at this time.

o “Now take time to copy the words you will use to describe your object into your “Words I Use When I Write” book”.

· The teacher models a descriptive sentence containing a list with commas and the word “and” prior to the last item in the list. o Write several example sentences using your collection of swimming objects. Have students contribute the describing words you will use for each object. Include at least three describing words, commas and the word “and”.
 * “My flip flop has rainbows on the side, white straps, and three**
 * circles on the bottom where I walk.”**


 * “My son’s super-soaker is as long as my arm, made of yellow,**
 * orange and clear plastic, and it shoots a long distance.”**

· Students evaluate teacher generated sample sentences which must contain a list of at least three describing words, separated by commas and the word “and” prior to the last item in the list. o Listen as I read this sentence aloud. o Look for mistakes. Raise you hand if you find one. o Look for capital letters, commas and ending punctuation marks.


 * My swim fin is black and longer than my foot**
 * my swim fin is rubbery, black and longer than my foot.**
 * My swim fin is rubbery, shiny, black and longer than my foot.**
 * My rubbery, black, swim fin is much longer than my foot, so I can**
 * push hard against the water.**

· Students use their objects, the chart paper word bank and their “Words I Use When I Write” books to rough draft descriptive sentences. o Now it’s your turn to write a sentence. Tell us three or more things you notice about your object. Use commas where they are needed. Use the word “and” before the last item. o As they finish, students come read the sentence aloud to you to **__key it into a Word Document__**. Have them do this surreptitiously, so no one but you will see or hear their work. o At their desk, have them draw each descriptive detail of the object into an illustration below the sentence in their “Writing spiral. o **__OR__** - After school/ as time allows; the teacher will **__scan and save__** electronic copies of the student rough drafts for use the next day. When no scanner was available, I keyed a word document containing the class’ sentences.


 * =Descriptive Sentence Rubric for _= ||
 * **Category** ||
 * **5** ||
 * **3** ||
 * **1** ||
 * **Capital letters** ||
 * **Capital letters** were used to **begin the sentence and** on **all proper nouns-names.** ||
 * A **capital letter** was used **to begin the sentence.** ||
 * **A capital letter** was **attempted** but **used incorrectly.** ||
 * **Punctuation** ||
 * **Ending punctuation** and **extra** **commas were correct.** ||
 * **Ending punctuation** and two **commas were correct.** ||
 * **Ending punctuation** **or** **a comma** was **correct.** ||
 * **Naming Part**
 * (noun)** ||
 * **Three or more naming parts** were used correctly. ||
 * **Two naming parts** were used correctly. ||
 * **A single naming part** was used correctly. ||
 * **Action Part**
 * (verb)** ||
 * **Two action parts or adverbs** were used. ||
 * **An action part was used**. ||
 * **No action part was used**. ||
 * **Descriptive word choice** ||
 * **Five describing words** used on nouns and/or verbs giving a clear image. ||
 * **Three describing words** were used. ||
 * **One describing word** was used. ||
 * **Illustration matches words used** ||
 * The **sentence relates to every detail** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to the majority** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to one detail** of the illustration. ||
 * **Three describing words** were used. ||
 * **One describing word** was used. ||
 * **Illustration matches words used** ||
 * The **sentence relates to every detail** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to the majority** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to one detail** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to one detail** of the illustration. ||

· The teacher projects and explains the rubric. o Point to the five categories on the rubric and ask, “Who can read the five categories or parts listed in these five boxes?” o Direct student attention to each “Point Value descriptor” for the five categories. Explain the rating scale 1 – 5. o Read each descriptor 1, 3, or 5 points. o Use the InterWrite highlighter tool on the rubric text as it is discussed.
 * Day Two:**


 * my swim suit is black and pink**
 * My swim suit is black, pink and has bows down the sides.**
 * My swim suits is stretchy, black, has pink bows down the sides**
 * and it’s mine!**

· On a split screen (tile horizontally on computer) a projected rubric and teacher-generated sentences are viewed simultaneously. · The samples exemplify correct and incorrect descriptive sentences. · Together, the teacher and students rubric score the sentences and add editing marks and revisions with the InterWrite pen. · Students are given additional time to alter their rough draft using a hard copy of the projected rubric. The projected rubric image remains in view. · On the split screen, anonymous student sentences displayed via an LCD projector are edited the first time by the teacher holding the InterWrite pen. (This allows the teacher to clarify errors made by numerous students.)

· Later, student authors hold the pen and mark their projected writing sample. Generally student interest holds for three to four samples.

In turn, show the rubric and ask the following questions about each sample sentence: o “Are capital letters used to begin the sentence and on proper nouns or names, to earn a top score of 5?” o “Is a capital letter used correctly to earn a 3?” o “Is a capital letter used but not used correctly to earn a 1?”

o “Is an ending punctuation mark used and are three or more commas used correctly, to earn a 5?” o “Is an ending punctuation mark used and are two commas used correctly to earn a 3?” o “Is one ending mark or one comma used correctly to earn a 1?

o “Are three or more naming words used correctly to earn a 5?” o “Are two naming words used to earn a 3?” o “Is one naming part used correctly to earn a 1?”...and so on.

o Continue asking other categories in like manner and scoring until a chorus is responding correctly, showing their understanding.

o Calling upon individual students at this time will allow checking for individual understanding and students may want to begin holding the InterWrite Pad and pen to mark their own sentence.

o This process will need to occur during several short sessions in order to hold student attention.


 * Day Three, Four and Five:**

· Student authors hold the InterWrite pen as classmates and teacher question if corrections are needed in specific places. Repeat for as many days as are needed to revise everyone’s work. · Revised drafts are saved and printed to hard copies for later use. · Students are given time to publish sentences and add illustrations.

· Place all the swimming objects on the floor in the center of the class circle. · Have one child at a time read his descriptive sentence aloud to the class, keeping his paper inside a writing folder so no one sees the illustration. · When the author is finished reading, he will ask, “What am I describing?” · The class will point to the object they believe matches to the words read. · The author will go pick up the correct object, place it with his writing folder on his desk and return to the circle. · When all objects are claimed and all sentences read, a “walk-about” will follow; students going to each desk to view objects and sentences. · Authors store their writing inside their writing folders.
 * Last Day:**


 * Objects are kept for the writing of descriptive stories the following week. These stories will contain the sentence written the first week and describe how the author has used the object in the past.
 * The same writing process will be used. However, we will also use private, individual editing conferences and editing groups in which peers assist each other in proof reading each rough draft. Authors hold the pen as peers measure the draft against the rubric.


 * I circulate between groups listening and coaching.
 * We have the option to use whole-class editing, a projected rubric with a copy of their published story, if further revision is needed, or a group generated grade is needed to stimulate change in an author’s work. This only occurs when a supportive and positive writing community has been established in our classroom. Students are never permitted to ridicule an author.

SS1 Reading-B1.3 identifies and distinguishes between letters, words and sentences. SS3 Writing-B1.1 uses words…to record thoughts, facts, and ideas. SS3 Writing-B2.3 revises writing with assistance, focusing on the six traits of writing. SS3 Writing-B2.4 edits for conventions such as capitalization, end punctuation and spelling. SS3 Writing-B2.5 publishes a legible final copy SS3 Writing-B6.1 uses descriptive phrases/sentences to express ideas SS3 Writing-B6.2 identify nouns and verbs in sentences SS3 Writing-B8.1 writes a simple sentence SS3 Writing-B8.2 capitalizes the beginning of a sentence SS3 Writing-B8.3 uses correct ending punctuation (period and question mark)
 * Academic standards:**
 * Communications writing standard for complete descriptive sentence:**

IT.1.1.1c Demonstrates correct mouse skills (select, click, double click, drag and draw tools) Kids will be using the stylus for the InterWrite Pad, as if it were a mouse to write, click, double click, and navigate the screen.
 * Cheney Mastery Level Instructional Technology Standards:**

D. Plan strategies to manage student learning in a technology-enriched environment.
 * [|ISTE standards]:**
 * I. Planning and Designing Learning Environments and Experiences**

A. Use technology to support learner-centered strategies that address the diverse needs of students. B. Apply technology to develop students’ higher order skills and creativity. C. Manage student learning activities in a technology-enhanced environment.
 * II.** **Teaching, Learning, and the Curriculum**

projectors, InterWrite School Pad, Stylus, click, double click, save, print screen, mouse mode, pen mode
 * Vocabulary:** rubric, scoring, edit, revise, publish, complete sentence, describing words, LCD


 * =Descriptive Sentence Rubric for _= ||
 * **Category** ||
 * **5** ||
 * **3** ||
 * **1** ||
 * **Capital letters** ||
 * **Capital letters** were used to **begin the sentence and** on **all proper nouns-names.** ||
 * A **capital letter** was used **to begin the sentence.** ||
 * **A capital letter** was **attempted** but **used incorrectly.** ||
 * **Punctuation** ||
 * **Ending punctuation** and **three or more commas** were **used correctly.** ||
 * **Ending punctuation** and **two commas** were **correct.** ||
 * **Ending punctuation** **or** **a comma** was **correct.** ||
 * **Naming Part**
 * (noun)** ||
 * **Three or more naming parts** were used correctly. ||
 * **Two naming parts** were used correctly. ||
 * **One naming part** was used correctly. ||
 * **Action Part**
 * (verb)** ||
 * **Two action parts or adverbs** were used. ||
 * **An action part was used**. ||
 * **No action part was used**. ||
 * **Descriptive word choice** ||
 * **Five describing words** used on nouns and/or verbs giving a clear image. ||
 * **Three describing words** were used. ||
 * **One describing word** was used. ||
 * **Illustration matches words used** ||
 * The **sentence relates to every detail** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to the majority** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to one detail** of the illustration. ||
 * **Category** ||
 * **5** ||
 * **3** ||
 * **1** ||
 * The **sentence relates to every detail** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to the majority** of the illustration. ||
 * **The sentence relates to one detail** of the illustration. ||
 * **Category** ||
 * **5** ||
 * **3** ||
 * **1** ||
 * **1** ||